A Writer's Life

The Mail I Get - Dimwit Aspiring Writers Edition

Here are some great examples of how not to promote your self-published book. These are actual emails that I received from complete strangers. I have removed the book titles and the names of the authors to save them embarrassment.

My third novel, XYZ. is now available for review. If you would like a review copy, I will gladly send you one.

Why would I care if his book was available for review? Why would anyone when this guy can't even be bothered to tell us what the hell his book is about? I'm sure when his book bombs, he'll be totally baffled by its failure. The same goes for this guy:

My novel 'XYZ' is now available on Amazon's Kindle (PC, Mac, Blackberry, Android, Iphone, Ipad) It is also available directly from me as a pdf file @ XYZ. The paperback edition will be available next week on Amazon. Let me know what you think!

Why would I do that? I don't know him and I don't know anything about his book. Does he think that I have nothing better to do than download unidentified crap from total strangers? If this is his idea of brilliant promotion, just imagine what his idea of compelling drama is.  A week or so later, he sent me another email:

I wrote XYZ as pure entertainment.Sure, it's a vampire story. But it's set in Las Vegas, and it's told in short, cliffhanger chapters full of dialog and action. Just read the first 4 chapters (like I said, they're short), and if you're NOT hooked, then let me know and I'll leave you alone.

He still thinks I care.  You'd think my total lack of response would be a subtle hint that I don't and never will. But a least this time he's said a little something about his book. Nothing that would make any sentient being want to read it, but still, he made a slight effort. Unlike, say, this woman:

My book XYZ is out. You can buy it here (XYZ). Please promote it on your blogs and sites.

Of course I will. But why stop there? Could I also pass out fliers on your behalf? Or maybe make some cold calls? Let me know. I am at your service.

Ebooks Are Not the Enemy

Jeffrey Trachtenberg of The Wall Street Journal reports that authors are getting screwed by publishers in the ebook business.

It has always been tough for literary fiction writers to get their work published by the top publishing houses. But the digital revolution that is disrupting the economic model of the book industry is having an outsize impact on the careers of literary writers.

[...]The new economics of the e-book make the author's quandary painfully clear: A new $28 hardcover book returns half, or $14, to the publisher, and 15%, or $4.20, to the author. Under many e-book deals currently, a digital book sells for $12.99, returning 70%, or $9.09, to the publisher and typically 25% of that, or $2.27, to the author.

But Trachtenberg leaves out an attractive third option (and I have no idea why he did). What he doesn't say is that an author can publish their ebooks to the Kindle themselves and earn 70% of whatever the purchase price is ($2.06 on a $2.99 ebook). So why even bother with a publisher? I know it's a question more and more mid-list and literary authors are asking themselves. I certainly am.

The problem here isn't the rise of  ebooks...it's publishers that are a) charging too much for ebooks and b) not giving a fair royalty on ebooks to authors.

In other words, it's not ebooks that are the problem here, it's the publishers failing to adapt.

Key Art Mock-Ups

In case our first REMAINDERED posters are too "violent" for some venues or publications, our ace graphic designer Brian Bolin has put together these two mock-ups for an alternative poster. What do you think of'em? (The picture quality will be sharpened on the final posters).

TV Main Title of the Week

Paul Levine: The Mentalist

Mystery writer Paul Levine stumbles on a crime-in-progress in his neighborhood and plays detective in this very funny blog post. Here's a snippet:

When the cops arrived ten minutes later, I told them the guy was late 30's, 6-1, 190 pounds, bleached spiked hair and spoke with a Russian accent. The car, I suggested, was possibly stolen. Maybe owned by a woman who was a life insurance broker in Orange County. She might need assistance walking, and it's possible her initials are "L.F."

The cops gave me sideways glances. Like who the hell was this guy, "The Mentalist?"

I explained. The license plate holder is from a dealer in Anaheim. In the front seat, there's a blue handicapped parking sticker and a hardcover book. Married Lovers by Jackie Collins. Men don't read her. The personalized license plate is "LF CLU."

"Her name might be Lois Fenstermacher," I suggested, helpfully. "And she could be a Chartered Life Underwriter."

The cops weren't impressed.

A Sequel to THE WALK?

If you read my novel THE WALK,   I have a question for you...

But first, a little background for those of you who haven't read it. The book has sold over 10,000 copies since I made it available for the Kindle back in June 2009.  In the book, Los Angeles is flattened by an earthquake and a guy stuck downtown when it happens sets off to walk across a landscape of devastation to get back to his wife, who is at their home in the San Fernando Valley.

Okay, so here's the question...

My wife thinks I should write a sequel, exclusively for the Kindle, to THE WALK, set over the same two days, except told from the wife's point-of-view and revealing what she was going through while her husband made his journey. 

What do you think? Would you be interested in reading that?

Looking Backward and Forward

It's been almost two weeks since we wrapped REMAINDERED and yesterday I was finally able to see -- after some tech problems and delays -- all of the footage we shot and an editor's assembly of most of the movie (minus one scene).

I am extremely happy with what we've got and thrilled with the performances by the entire cast. The cast and crew did an amazing job....far exceeding my expectations.  

Today I sent the editors -- PJ Starks and Rodney Newton -- detailed notes on all the scenes and now I am eagerly awaiting their next pass, which I hope to see in bits and pieces over the weekend and into early next week. Hopefully, we can get the film locked next week so we can start working on the sound & music mix.

But this editing from afar is extraordinarily frustrating for me. I'm back in L.A. and the editors are in Owensboro, Kentucky. I'd much prefer to be able to sit in the editing room with them while they do my notes...as I have on the hundreds of hours of TV that I've produced.  If things bog down too much, either on the editing or the mix, I'll fly back for a weekend and work with them to get it done in time for our Oct. 16 premiere screening at Bouchercon in San Francisco.

While reviewing the footage and the editor's assembly, I was struck again by something writer/producer Michael Gleason taught me. You have four chances to make your show. There's the show you visualize in your mind... there's the show that's created in the script that you write....there's the show that's created in filming...and there's the show that's created in editing. There can often be a considerable difference between each of those creations...and each stage offers you the chance to "rewrite" the story, if not on the page than in the performances, the shots, and in the final editing.

The movie isn't exactly what I imagined when I wrote the REMAINDERED short story or the script. Surprisingly, in some ways, Lee the Writer and Lee The Director ended up being two different people with  sometimes differing takes on the material. I found myself changing the tone to some degree, and the characters, in the way I directed the actors and in how I chose to shoot it... and, now, in how I am choosing to edit it. It's been fascinating and fun for me.

I found that directing was like writing with cameras. I was surprised by how clearly I saw the movie in my mind when it came time to actually shoot it. I knew exactly what shots I wanted...which helped me make my days (time-wise and budget-wise) and made it easy to decide which of my crew's clever ideas to accept or reject.

I made some mistakes, of course.  There's one shot I'm kicking myself for not getting (I didn't think I needed it and I was wrong) and one scene I wish I'd staged a little differently in the master (but it's not a big problem).

There was one location I wasn't able, for various reasons, to see with my own eyes until we shot there (I approved it based on photos). The location was a big mistake in so many ways, but we were able to cheat it, thanks to the cleverness of my "indie" crew. It works, though not nearly as well as I would have liked it to. In that same scene, there was one seemingly simple prop I didn't see until it was time to shoot it...and took for granted that it would be right... and, of course, what I got was totally wrong. We had to cheat that, too, but we made it work, though again not nearly as well as it would have with the right prop.

And there was one critical piece of set decoration that turned out completely wrong, which would have been a crippling problem for us if not for some amazing, last-minute help from the terrific folks at the Evansville Barnes & Noble. 

We overcame all those issues... and made a film I know that I am going to be immensely proud of. But I learned an important lesson from making those mistakes, all of which were entirely my fault. Next time, no matter how overly meticulous or controlling it may make me seem, I'll make sure I see every single thing in advance and not take anyone's word that something was done the way that I wanted it to be. I will need to verify everything.

Oddly enough, my biggest mistake was on an issue not related to filming. I didn't personally see to it that we had an on-set photographer to take production stills... and that mistake has become a real problem for us now as we're preparing our publicity. We have hundreds of behind-the-scenes production photos taken by crew people...but we have only four...yes, you read right, four...pictures that could be considered production stills (scenes in the movie). And those were taken by chance by a member of our crew. We could use frame grabs, but since we didn't shoot this film in high-def, the quality is going to be poor.

But those are all minor quibbles in what was a fantastic experience with a great crew of talented, and hard-working, local actors and film-makers.  I loved directing and can't wait to do it again...and maybe, if I am lucky, it might be with the same group of people.

(Pictured above: Eric Altheide and Sebrina Siegel in frame-grabs from the time-coded "dailies")

Could Konrath Become the First Kindle Millionaire?

Everyone knows that Joe Konrath's books are doing remarkably well on the Kindle. But the actual numbers are astonishing. He's sold 103,864 ebooks across all platforms since 2004...78,000 of them on the Kindle. Here's how his numbers break down...and for comparison's sake, he's included both his self-published and professionally published books. 

My six Hyperion ebooks, from June 2004 until December 2009: 7865

Afraid from Grand Central, from May 2009 until December 2009: 13,973

Self-pubbed titles on Kobo from May 2010 until July 2010: 132

Self-pubbed titles on Smashwords since July 2009: 372

Self-pubbed titles on iPad from May 2010 until August 2010: 390

Self-pubbed titles on iTunes from Jan 2010 until July 2010: 508

Self-pubbed titles on Barnes & Noble from June 2010 until August 2010: 2212

Self pubbed titles on Amazon from April 2009 until Sept 20, 2010: 78,412

So what does all of this mean to the home viewer? Currently, I'm selling an average of 7000 self-pubbed ebooks a month on Kindle.

The fascinating part of Joe's post are his comparisons between what he is earning from his Hyperion ebooks and what he is earning on his own. For example:

My best selling Hyperion ebook, Whiskey Sour, has sold 2631 ebooks since 2004. That's earned me about $2200, or $34 a month since it was released.

$34 a month per ebook is a far cry from the $1700 a month per ebook I'm making on my own.

Why are my self-pubbed ebooks earning more than Whiskey Sour, which remains my bestselling print title with over 80,000 books sold in various formats?

Because Hyperion has priced Whiskey Sour at $4.69 on Amazon, and I price my ebooks at $2.99.

For each $4.69 ebook they sell, I earn $1.17.

For each $2.99 ebook I sell, I earn $2.04.

So I'm basically losing money hand over fist because Hyperion is pricing my ebooks too high, and giving me too low a royalty rate.

Even the print sales (Whiskey Sour just went into a fifth printing) don't come close to making up the money I'm losing.

If we assume I could sell 833 copies per month of Whiskey Sour, I'd be earning $17,000 per year on it, rather than $5616 per year. (I'm guessing my numbers have gone up recently, and am estimating 400 Whiskey Sour sales per month.)

Let's multiply that times the six books Hyperion controls.

I'm estimating I currently earn $33,696 annually in ebook royalties on those six.

If I had the rights, I estimate I'd earn $102,000.

Do I want my books to go out of print?

Hell yeah.

[...]I'll end 2010 having earned over $100k on my self-pubbed ebooks, and that's nothing compared to what I expect to make in 2011. And I'm doing it without touring, without promoting non-stop, without spending a lot of money, and without relying on anyone.

 

It's no wonder that Joe has opted to focus his literary efforts almost entirely on ebooks and to turn his back, for the most part, on NY print publishers. Financially for him, it's a no brainer.

I have to admit that Joe's experience -- and, to a lesser degree, my own -- are changing some of my long-held beliefs about the publishing business. And it's also made me think twice about whether I should write my next book for a publisher... or for myself, a thought that never would have entered my head a year ago.

TV Main Title of The Week - Worst Show in the History of Television Edition

Remaindered Movie Poster

Here's the preliminary movie poster for REMAINDERED, designed by Brian Bolin and featuring a photo by Neil Kellen.

 Which tagline do you like better...

1) The Bargain Bin is Murder

2) A Novel Way to Die

(You can click on the image for a larger view)

TV Main Title of the Week

The rarely seen... or heard ... vocal theme to the SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN, written by Glen A. Larson and performing by Dusty Springfield. The end titles have the full, craptastic song.

Watch THE GLADES Tonight

Yeah, I know BOARDWALK EMPIRE and MAD MEN are on tonight. But please don't forget to set your DVR's for tonight's episode of THE GLADES, which I wrote with William Rabkin.  It's entitled "Booty" and it's all about pirate treasure, murder, and the relationship between Longworth & Callie, which changes significantly before the end credits roll...

TV Main Title of the Week - Hawaii Five-O Edition

Here's the revised main title sequence for the new HAWAII FIVE-O. The big change is that they've scrapped their "reboot" of the theme and went back to the original orchestration.

 

Star Wars 5-0

Thanks to Ken Levine for tipping me off to this great mash-up of HAWAII FIVE-O and STAR WARS.

 

Remaindered on TV

Here's the TV news report on REMAINDERED that aired last week. 

 

Remaindered in the News, 2

REMAINDERED made today's Evansville Courier-Press. Out of all of my credits, why does the Evansville press keep rubbing my nose in BAYWATCH? :-)

 

‘Quiet on the set!’: Part of short film shot at local Sureway store

By Donna Stinnett

Sureway customers picking up their groceries this past Sunday at the Watson Lane location may have been a bit surprised to find a movie crew shooting in the store while they shopped.

The scenes were for a short film called “Remaindered” by writer and director Lee Goldberg, who has written for the television shows “Monk” and “Baywatch” and who was an executive producer for “Diagnosis Murder.”

Goldberg has had an association with the International Mystery Writer’s Festival in Owensboro. “Remaindered” is being sponsored by The RiverPark Performing Arts Center, Kentucky Wesleyan College, Brescia College and Owensboro Technical College.

This current film, which was largely created through the production and acting assistance of local volunteers, will premiere Oct. 16 at the World Mystery Convention called Bouchercon being held this year in San Francisco.

Lewis Chaney, who premiered his own locally made feature-length film, “victimEYES,” last fall and who worked with Goldberg on “Remaindered,” described it as a “very dark comedy” about an author who commits a murder then realizes he’s done away with his only remaining fan.

A crew of about 25 to 30 worked on the scenes shot at Sureway all day Sunday, Chaney said.

“It looked like a full-scale production,” he said. “And Sureway was wonderful to us. They gave us tons of access.”

“It’s giving local filmmakers and local actors a chance to experience the way we make movies and TV shows in Hollywood,” Goldberg said in an interview with WEHT Channel 25, where Chaney is an assignments manager in the newsroom.

“Obviously it’s not a full $25-million Hollywood production or weekly TV series, but we’re using the same principals of pre-production and shooting on this little film that we’d be using in a Hollywood production,” he added.

Henderson residents Chaney and Neil Kellen, who is a co-worker, fellow filmmaker and who was technical consultant for “victimEYES,” designed the lighting for “Remaindered” working with independent filmmakers P.J. Starks and Rodney Newton, who made “Hallows Eve: Slaughter on Second Street.”

“This really helps legitimizes what we’re doing,” Chaney said. “It’s really cool for the local indie filmmakers.”,p> Other locations used in “Remaindered” included a private residence and Danhauers Drugs in Owensboro and “a couple of desolate areas around Owensboro for driving shots,” Chaney said.

Andrew Coburn

Five years ago, I blogged about discovering author Andrew Coburn's terrific crime novels and how wowed I was by his books. Today I got this note from his daughter:

This is a pivotal time in Andrew Coburn's life. He is my dad. He's written, I think, 14 novels and though he hasn't stopped writing (been writing lots of short stories published online and in university periodicals), he is struggling with a life-threatening illness. His family is around him, of course, but he needs to be reminded there is life beyond the four walls.That his work has been --and more importantly, still is--his lifeblood. I can forward any mail: Cathleen Coburn; 4 Patricia St, WIndham, NH 03087. My email is cathycoburn@live.com Thank you! If his words have inspired you, touched you or mattered in some way, please let your words do the same for him. My father's daughter, Cathy Coburn

If you are a fan of Coburn's work, now is the time to let him know!

Mr. Monk and the Nice Review

Amazingly prolific  author James Reasoner has  given MR. MONK IS CLEANED OUT a rave review on his blog. He says, in part:

What’s left to say about Lee Goldberg’s Monk books? You already know they’re some of the very best TV tie-in books being published today. More than that, they’re some of the very best mystery novels being published today, period. MR. MONK IS CLEANED OUT is the latest in the series, and it’s excellent, as always.[...]The plot is appropriately twisty, but as usual, Goldberg plays fair with the clues. Monk has never been more miserable (or funnier), and Natalie’s narration is as charming and appealing as ever.

Thank you, James!

The Happy Accident

  From Sebrina Siegel, our leading lady on REMAINDERED...

I once had a friend ask me what a “happy accident” was, and I explained the term (which I had learned as a photography student and frequently used) as best I could. I so wish I had had the filming of today’s final scene for REMAINDERED to give as an example.

We’re at the Sureway in Henderson, Kentucky, surrounded by about 20-30 crew members, extras, and local observers, and we’re filming our last scene…which is actually the first scene of the film.

It’s a wide shot, an attempt to get the entire master scene and include the grocery store background, the extras picking their produce and ignoring “Kevin” (actor Eric Altheide), the crazy wart lady (actress Lisa Baldwin) walking in for a short, absurd discussion, and finally, the fatal meeting of “Kevin” and “Megan”. The steadicam is slowly making its way around the area and just as the scene begins an old (very) man walks in to frame behind his grocery cart. He slowly pushes it up to the table, looking curiously at the books that are displayed just so and the “author” next to them, likely wondering, “Now just who the hell is this guy?”

The man, his gums smacking and lips actually flopping around a bit, touches one of the books, maybe trying to figure out if it’s something he’s read. And on cue, Suzy, the wart lady, comes into the scene, choosing to stay in character as she asks about wart cream and steadily ignoring the elderly gentleman standing next to her, gums visible as he gapes at her rudeness.

After a few looks at this crazy woman, the man slowly takes his hand off the book, and glances again at our “author”, now even more curious but not about to interrupt the wart lady. He backs his cart away from the table…and over to the bin of potatoes behind our “set”.

Somehow…and we really don’t have any idea…he still hasn’t noticed the many lights around the table, the steadicam or its operator, Adam Tyler, who is slowly moving around the space, the gigantic, fuzzy boom that is directly over our “author’s” head, or the huge crowd of onlookers just past the table who are stuffing their fists in their mouths and banging each other on the back, trying so hard not to laugh out loud.

The other extras are cued in as the dialogue continues between the actors, and they wisely, as if they’ve done it a million times, ignore the gentleman at the potatoes and still hit their marks, even if he is a bit in their way. The wart lady is discussing cats now, and the man continues to glance over a few times, even while holding his potatoes up in the air for inspection. They look pretty good, so he moves over to the apples…which happen to also be within the frame. These don’t require as much inspection so he chooses his select few and hobbles out of frame, slowly pushing his cart, and our scene continues to its finish…without a hitch.

It took our AD, Rachael Nunn, a few tries to get this man to understand that he’d wandered onto a film set, and that we really, really needed him to sign the release…this footage was not to be lost!

And so ends the third day of shooting REMAINDERED, the short film written and directed by Lee Goldberg. It seems to me that just the fact that I was lucky enough to be cast as the female lead in this project was a happy accident. I learned of the auditions only the day before they ended, and learned from casting that the video auditions needed to be in that day as well. But a call to the producer bought me a weekend, begging John to video it and play my off-screen partner got me the audition tape, and I was lucky enough to get the part.

I was a bit nervous, working with a director who has that caliber of success in Hollywood, but numerous email conversations about character, wardrobe, and angles eased the jitters.

I won’t go day by day, but I will say that I’ve learned so much about…well, so much working on this project.

I learned that nerves are good for me. I learned that having a kick-ass, completely together AD on set is imperative to the film’s success.

I’ve learned that I want to hire Pablo as my own personal assistant – just long enough for him to organize everything around me.

I’ve learned that implied nudity means that it’s easy to cover you in ways to make the audience think you’re uncovered, but it’s much more difficult to keep covered while the crew is trying to “imply” the nudity (I am happy to report that we were completely successful with this…thanks to the use of many safety pins).

I’ve learned that it’s possible to wrap on time with the right amount of preproduction preparation and a strict AD.

I’ve learned that the lighting crew can literally save a scene.

I’ve learned just how much talent we have in N.W. Kentucky.

And I’ve learned that Lee Goldberg is not only a great writer and producer, but an outstanding director who is not afraid to give direction, and when he does, does it well and with purpose.

Really, what a great experience.

TV Main Title of the Week

It's a Wrap

We've wrapped REMAINDERED. I'll blog more about it later tonight or tomorrow.  But in the mean time, there are a ton of "behind-the-scenes" photos up on the Remaindered Facebook Group page. The image above, of a killer reading  "Forensics for Dummies" after killing a woman, was my inspiration for the short story REMAINDERED....and that has now become a short film, too.  This is not a screen grab...it's a posed photo that Neil Kellen took "recreating" the scene that we'd just shot.  But I love it. 

Me on the Radio

Here's an interview I did with WKWC 90.3 FM  in Owensboro about REMAINDERED and TV writing/production in general.  It was a lot of fun to do. 

The First Two Days

Sorry I haven't had a chance to blog yet...I've been busy directing.  The filming has been going great. I couldn't be more pleased with how things have turned  out.  Everybody has been giving it their best and although it has been hard work, it's been a lot of fun.  We've  even managed to dodge all the thunderstorms...despite the dark clouds that keep rolling in.

Our first day began  at 6 p.m. at Roxi Witt's home, which we essentially invaded (I bet  this is the first, and last, time Roxi ever lets a film crew in her house). The first night jam-packed in all of our most difficult scenes. In fact, when we were planning our shooting schedule, I assumed we wouldn't finish our work and would have to push a good chunk  of it to Saturday, and then  come back to the location at the end of our shoot on Sunday to pick up whatever bits and pieces were left.

But I am pleased to say things didn't turn out that way. We only went an hour over...but we still managed to get all of our scenes. The only thing that had to be pushed were some "Drive Bys" of our protagonist in his car, which would ordinarily be handled by a second unit anyway, but we snagged those last night.

On our second day, we started at  Danhauer Drugs in Owensboro, where the friendly staff was extraordinarily patient and hospitable to us as we re-arranged their store and occupied  most of the available  space. We also got a big assist from Russ Day of the Sheriff's Department, who added considerable "production value" to our little film with his participation.

We were slow starting out Saturday morning. but made up for it as the day went on. We were an  hour ahead going into a company move back to Roxi's house and didn't have to drop a single shot or trim a single scene. Things bogged down a bit at Roxi's, but it was an ambitious day and yet we still managed to complete all of our work. We are going into our final day Sunday with nothing that we need to pick-up.

I am so impressed by the inventiveness  and creativity of the crew, particularly our camera and lighting team (PJ Starks, Adam Tyler and Lewis Chaney). Their can-do attitude and their obvious enthusiasm for film-making is refreshing and pumps everyone up. And there's no way we could have done so much in so little time if not for my assistant director Rachael Nunn... who has been doing an exemplary job despite breaking her arm a few days before shooting. 

And I really, really, REALLY lucked out with the cast. Our three leads -- Eric Altheide, Sebrina Siegel, and Todd Reynolds -- are just terrific. They have nailed every scene they've been in, making my job so easy and a real pleasure.

We'll have some behind-the-scenes photos to share with you soon...

 

One Day and Counting...

Today I trimmed hedges at the house where we will be shooting tomorrow night ...not exactly what I expected to be doing in  prep, but we're a small film, with limited resources, and I knew how I wanted those hedges to look. So it  seemed like the easiest  way to get it done. I'm sure Tarantino and Spielberg trim hedges during prep, too. I rewarded myself with lunch  at the Moonlite BBQ, where I enjoying listening to all those Kentucky accents.

Afterwards, I changed shirts and spoke at Kentucky Wesleyan College about  pre-production film-making. I had a great time and I think the audience enjoyed it too. Afterwards, I did a quick interview with the campus radio station and then headed to the Riverpark Performing Arts Center to take a last look at all the props and run the production meeting, which went quickly and smoothly.

I marked the end of our months of pre-production by taking Roxi Witt,  Todd Reynolds (one of our actors), PJ Starks and Rodney Newton out to dinner to thank them for all their help making this  movie  happen.

Now all that's left is to start shooting tomorrow... unfortunately, I brought my Goldberg luck  with me, so Owensboro's long, dry, sunny streak  is about to be broken with thunderstorms all weekend. This is  likely to complicate things, particularly our exterior work, but  it wouldn't be movie-making if their weren't a few complications....

Unfanboy Enjoys his WALK

The blogger  Unfanboy's very positive review of THE WALK is the most detailed, and thorough, one the book has received yet. Here's a taste.

The plot seems simple enough: it is the story of a man’s attempt to get home and find his wife after the long-anticipated “Big One” earthquake more or less levels Los Angeles. As the book’s peripatetic title might suggest, it is more of a philosophical meditation than a thriller – except that makes the book sound much less funny than it actually is. It might be more appropriate to describe The Walk as a kind of anti-apocalypse novel, or perhaps a satire on every disaster movie you’ve ever seen – but like the best satires, it offers some redemption in the end.

The center of this non-thriller is its rather unheroic protagonist, Martin Slack. Marty is a television network executive who is doing pretty well for himself but also realizes the emptiness of his work. He had once hoped to be a writer and even made decent headway on a novel, but most of his time is now spent giving “notes” on rehashed scripts in snooty restaurants. He is also married to a woman he loves, but their relationship has come to be dominated by their inability to have a child. As he comes to reflect near the end of the book, the symbols of his life have become “the blank page and the semen cup.”

Thanks so much, Unfanboy!

Two Days and Counting

I arrived in Evansville, Indiana on Tuesday afternoon, grabbed a rental car and headed for the local Barnes & Noble, which kindly loaned us the remaindered books we need to dress our sets. We owe them a great, big, THANK YOU.  Without them, we'd be sunk. I loaded the books in my car  and went straight to one of our four locations --- Sureway Grocery in  Henderson, where I met our gaffer Lewis Chaney and  the store manager,  who is incredibly enthusiastic and helpful. It's the perfect location for the opening scenes of our film and I saw exactly how I wanted to shoot it... and how I could steal a lot of coverage with my second camera as I went along. I used my little Flip HD camcorder to take some rough approximations of my shots (for myself, not for anyone else to see) 

I drove through a sudden, powerful thunderstorm between Henderson and Owensboro... the worst downpour  I've ever experienced....and had to pull off the road to wait  it out. Thankfully, it passed in about fifteen minutes and I drove on.

My first stop in Owensboro was at Danhauer Drugs,  where the end of our movie will take place. It's going to be cramped, and cluttered, but I am going use that to my advantage from a story-telling standpoint. I'll play up how cramped it is, working with it rather than  against it. I figured out how I wanted to re-arrange displays, what I'd have to cheat, and how I could accomplish what I  wanted with as few set-ups in there as possible. It's going to work just fine.

My final stop was at the home of Roxi Witt, where we will be shooting the "middle" of  our movie. I walked through the house, figured out what furniture and decor needed to be moved out, what we'd have to bring in, and where we'd have to put it.  I figured out my shots, used my little Flip HD camcorder to try get'em down for myself, and then called it a night.

This morning, after sleeping for 12 straight hours, I found a booth at the Waffle House, had breakfast, and spent the next two hours going over the script, marking the key dramatic points, the key tonal shifts, and the moments when  I felt a close-up was essential, which cameras would take a character's move, etc.  Then I went the Riverpark Performing Arts Center,  met Roxi and a team of PAs, and went back to her house to "direct" re-arranging and set decorating.

I went from there to Don Moore Chevrolet, which is kindly providing the "picture cars" for our film, then returned to Riverpark to do an interview with the Messenger-Inquirer, then  went to Brescia College to  give a two-hour talk on TV writing. Afterwards, I met with PJ Starks (DP), Rodney Newton (producer), Lewis Chaney (Gaffer, Location Scout), Adam Tyler (Camera), Pablo Gallastegui (Script Supervisor) and Rachael Nunn (First Assistant Director) to  go on our tech scout of the locations...so they could hear what I had in mind, offer their advice, share their  concerns, etc.  

They asked good questions and  had some great ideas. I changed  my thinking about how to stage one of  the scenes and I liked what we came up with much better than what I initially had in mind. That process also gave me the first chance I've had to convey, face-to-face, exactly how I  see  the movie --  the characters, the tone,  and the look. They got it right away. It came through in their ideas and questions, which were all, as we  would say in the TV biz, "on-franchise." They clearly got my thinking on how I want the movie to look and feel.  

The one location I haven't seen yet -- since it depends on Fire Department approval -- is the desolate spot where our protagonist burns the evidence of the murder he just committed. That location/decision won't be set until tomorrow... so I'll drive out to see it  before or after our production meeting.

I left the tech scout around  11 pm feeling really good about the movie... and confident in the team that Rodney and PJ have brought together for me to work with.  I'm sure we are going to have a a lot of fun and believe we'll get the movie done on time and on-budget.  

Tomorrow I'm going back out to Roxi's place to trim two bushes myself that are in one of  my shots. That's what  a hands-on director I am! After that, I have a seminar to lead at Kentucky Wesleyan and it's back to Riverpark Performing Arts Center for our production meeting. 

(Pictured above -- Lewis Chaney,  Lee Goldberg, PJ Starks in Danhauer Drugs in Owensboro, talking about a shot. Photo by Rodney Newton)

Kentucky Bound

Today I am in transit to Owensboro, Kentucky, where I will be directing my short film REMAINDERED this weekend with a local cast and crew.  I shall report back soon and let you know how it's going.

 

Hilarious Shatner Spoof

Jason Alexander and Stephen Collins "recreate" a scene from STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE back in 2004 on Craig Kilborn's show.

 

DEAD SPACE for under a buck

I've slashed the price on the Kindle edition of DEAD SPACE to only 99 cents for the rest of this month. The book is the sequel to my first novel, MY GUN HAS BULLETS, and was originally published in 1995 under the title BEYOND THE BEYOND. 

Ex-cop Charlie Willis handles "special security" at Pinnacle Pictures. His job: to protect the studio and its stars, to stop scandals before they explode, to keep the peace in the land of make-believe. When Pinnacle revives the cult, 1960s TV series "Beyond the Beyond" as the cornerstone of a fourth network, two powerful forces fight for control of the show—a talent agency that uses blackmail, torture, and murder to keep its clients on the A-list, and a homicidal legion of rabid fans led by an insane actor who thinks he's in outer space.

CRITICAL ACCLAIM FOR DEAD SPACE:

“Goldberg uses just about everything he can think of to send up the studio system, fandom, Star Trek, Trekkies, agents, actors… you name it, he’ll make you laugh about it.” Analog

"An outrageously entertaining take on the loathsome folkways of contemporary showbiz," Kirkus Reviews

“Mr. Goldberg has an observant eye and a wicked pen!” Washington Times

“[It] reads like a modern-day Alice in Wonderland set against the venal world of the TV industry. It’s wonderfully revealing and uncannily accurate,” Vancouver Sun (Canada)

"Some of the easily recognizable actors, agents and producers who are mercilessly ribbed may find it hard to crack a smile at the author's gag-strewn prose, likewise those seekers after politically correct entertainment. But the rest of us should have no trouble….the novel's satiric slant is strong enough to have an effigy of Goldberg beamed into outer space at the next Star Trek convention," Los Angeles Times

"Pinnacle Pictures has decided to revive a 25-year-old cult sci-fi TV show called Beyond the Beyond, but somebody keeps killing off the new cast. Is it the Hollywood agent who eats human flesh? The aging actor who still thinks he's a starship captain? The fans who live only to attend conventions? This sharp roman a clef goes where no Hollywood satire has gone before—altering just enough facts to avoid the libel courts but still smacking of a certain je ne sais Trek. It probably won't make Goldberg, a television writer and producer (Baywatch, Spenser: For Hire, seaQuest), the most popular boy on the Paramount lot, but it's a stingingly funny novel just the same." 
—Entertainment Weekly 

"The hilarious follow-up to Goldberg's witty debut, My Gun Has Bullets...[this book] skewers the entertainment business, which Goldberg knows well," Oline Codgill, Knight-Ridder Newspapers.

"As in his riotous novel My Gun Has Bullets, TV writer/producer Goldberg once again bites the hand that feeds him, laughing all the while. Inspired silliness," Publishers Weekly

Ed takes THE WALK

THE WALK probably wouldn't have been published by Five Star back in 2004 if it wasn't for Ed Gorman's enthusiastic recommendation to the editors. I've always known that he liked the book, but until his blog post today, I didn't realize how much. He says, in part:

it's a book far richer than most suspense novels[...]Marty Slack is the protagonist, a TV executive whose largest burden is being himself. As much as he resents and hates the grasping, greedy, treacherous people at the top of the TV ladder, he has to reluctantly admit to himself, in the course of his journey to reach home after being stranded miles away, that he is an awful lot like them. Slack is a character we get to know as well as we know people in the best of mainstream novels. Goldberg gives us a real live person here. And he doesn't cheat. We come to like Slack but there are moments when we see him as shallow, selfish and even pompous. But he's fascinating because he's so well detailed.

[...]And then there's Marty Slack's marriage. This storyline is another example of what I mean about Goldberg pushing against genre boundries. This isn't just a cliche portrait of a marriage in trouble. This, and at some length, is the dissection of two people who've realized that their marriage may be beyond repair. The scenes of recrimination, rage, despair hurt to witness. Beth Slack is just as painfully real as Marty Slack.

[...]This is a magnificent novel--by turns hilarious, scary, sad, witty and ultimately wise on its judgments about the way so many of us live these days.

Thank you so much, Ed!

TV Main Title of the Week

The Mail I Get

Over on Debbi Mack's blog, someone asked me:

Lee, you said that you would advise new authors (unpublished) to take a contract with a small press over self-publishing. Could you expand on that? What do you think that would offer them over the chance to sell more books and attract more readers?

Very few self-published authors are selling as well on the Kindle as Joe Konrath …or even close. But let’s say you are one of the lucky few selling about 500 copies of your book a month at $2.99, earning $1000-a-month in royalties.

If the sales hold, you’ll sell 6000 copies-a-year, and earn $12,000. A typical, low-end advance for a new writer would be about $6000, give or take a thousand. A low-end mass market print run would be about 30,000 copies...a hardcover run would likely be about 5000 (and, of course, in success it could be considerably more). Your book will be in most bookstores in the country, and if it’s a mass market paperback, probably most drugstores, convenience stores, and some airports. And, of course, there will also be an e-book edition. You might even get foreign sales, large print deals, and an audio book out of it, generating more income.

I would argue that you'd be a fool not to take a mid-list paperback or a hardcover deal over self-publishing on the Kindle. Financially, you might make less (in failure or only modest success)...but the difference will be more than made up for in editing, marketing, wider readership, wider name recognition, and professional prestige (and that prestige does mean something, whether you want to admit it or not).

You can always go back to self-publishing... and when you do, you will be bring that wider readership, name recognition, and professional prestige with you. But a book deal doesn't come along every day, and that's still going to mean something for a long time yet...and I suspect it still will if bookstores disappear.

I have no doubt the big reason my out-of-print are doing as well as they are is because they are riding on the large readership of my MONK and DIAGNOSIS MURDER books.

So let's use a real world example. Boyd Morrison sold thousands of copies of THE ARK on the Kindle...and abandoned Amazon in a nanosecond for a print deal. Why? Because he knew he could reach even more people and potentially make even more money (and sell the rights to other publishers around the world, not to mention audio, film, etc). He was thinking about his long-term career. It was a wise move...because you can always go back to self-publishing... but a contract from a major publisher is a lucky break that may not come again.

But don’t take my word for it… here’s what Boyd has had to say on the topic:

“If your goal is just to write and get your books out there where readers can find them, e-publishing lets you do that in a way that doesn't cost you thousands of dollars paid to vanity presses to get a few thousand copies that will molder in your basement. Instead, you can now make some decent money selling ebooks, which will reward independent writers who produce good books that are well-packaged and cleverly promoted. […] But if you are writing books to make a living (so that you can ditch your old job), you'll certainly have to consider the financial ramifications of staying indie versus going with a publisher. In my case, I wanted to reach as many readers as possible, and though ebooks are growing at an exponential rate, most sales are still currently in stores. In two years, those numbers will be very different, but for right now that's the situation. In addition, I'd be surprised if I ever would have gotten deals for The Ark in UK, Germany, Holland, Italy, and all the other countries without a US publishing deal. Although I'm not anywhere near the league of Stieg Larsson's sales, you can get an idea of how the US market compares to the rest of the world by looking at his numbers: he has sold 4 million books in the US, but he has sold over 40 million books worldwide. That percentage is not uncommon for authors of thrillers, which are what I happen to write. Yes, with the advent of Amazon Kindle UK, I could have put my books on that store as well, but I never would be able to put my books on Amazon Kindle Deutsche because I would need a German translator. And remember that Amazon Kindle UK wasn't even a faint glimmer when I got my publishing deal last year (47 Internet years ago). So truly take a deep look at what your goals are before you decide to take either the indie route or the traditional publishing route. Either way, you'll get to do what you love, which is write. But the effort, hassle, financial rewards, prestige, and desired readership should all be factors you consider in your decision.”

For me, and other mid-list authors, it’s an entirely different decision.

I got a $2000 advance when I sold THE WALK to Five Star in 2003. It was published in hardcover in 2004 and didn't earn out. It tanked. I have since sold close to 9000 copies of THE WALK on the Kindle. I make more in one month from Kindle sales on THE WALK than I did during the two years that the book was in print in hardcover.

If a publisher came to me today and offered me a mass market paperback deal for THE WALK, I probably wouldn't take it...because I don't see a scenario where I'd end up making more money on the book than I am making now. But it's easy for me to say that... I have 1 million copies of my MONK books in print with Penguin/Putnam.

If I was a newbie author, who'd never been in print before, I would probably take the mass market deal even if it meant earning less just for the exposure and professional credibility it would give me.

All that said, writers now have more options than ever before...which is great. And the rise of FREE self-publishing  (meaning no cash out-of-pocket) may finally drive into extinction Authorhouse, Jones Harvest, and all the other sleazy vanity presses out there that have preyed on the desperation and naivete of aspiring writers for too long.

Six Days and Counting

We start shooting REMAINDERED in Kentucky next week. I can't wait. 

We landed a terrific discount store location in Henderson this week, thanks to the beyond-the-call-of-duty efforts of our gaffer Lewis Chaney, so I'm greatly relieved. Not having a key location this late in the game was my biggest worry going into production. We still have one more location to find, but we have a couple of options  in play and a good place in reserve if they fall through.

Yesterday we were able to distribute our "first draft" shooting schedule and distribute call sheets to our crew.  I also tweaked the script a bit to factor in our new location and some production concerns. Now I can start obsessing on the little details...

But I'm going to be doing more than just directing the movie while I am in Owensboro. I'll also be leading three, two-hour seminars on film-making....

So I was up until 3 a.m. this morning preparing the presentations that I'll be doing at Brescia University on Sept 8, Kentucky Wesleyan on Sept 9, and Owensboro Community Technical on Sept 13 in conjunction with the production of the movie. For instance, for the post-production seminar at OCT, I edited together a reel with all the dailies from a scene in my movie FAST TRACK, then the rough cut of the scene, and then the final air version so I could walk them through the steps.

Now that I'm finished with that, I can concentrate entirely on prep... we have one last conference call/production meeting on Sunday, then I fly into Kentucky on Tuesday afternoon. I will scout my first location an hour or so after I land... and then I will try to see the other two before I go to bed that night.  

Wednesday I will update my shot-list and give it to Rachael Nunn, my extremely capable A.D. (who has been doing a tremendous job even though she broke her arm a few days ago!) so we can revise the shooting schedule. Then I have an interview with the local newspaper, a seminar to teach at Brescia University, and then a reception to attend afterwards.

Thursday I have another seminar to teach and a tech scout to the locations with the production team, followed by our production meeting. That's going to be a long day.

Friday I have rehearsals with the cast... and then we start shooting that evening...and on through the weekend. Editing begins Monday, when I also have another seminar to teach. We'll edit some more on Tuesday and, with luck, I'll have a rough cut to take back to L.A. with me on Wednesday. 

We'll do the rest of the editing online...and have our first screening at Bouchercon on Oct.  16.

I will keep you updated as we go.