A Writer's Life

I Am Looking Forward to "Dexter," the reality series

Variety reports that Showtime is bringing back THE L WORD...this time as a reality series.

Pay cabler has greenlit nine episodes of "The Real L Word: Los Angeles," from "L Word" creator Ilene Chaiken and reality producers Magical Elves ("Top Chef"). Show will follow six lesbians in Los Angeles as they go about their lives -- a lesbian answer to Bravo's "Real Housewives" franchise. Project is dependent on casting, the net said; if all goes as planned, "The Real L Word" would debut sometime next year.

If this works, the reality versions of DEXTER and THE TUDORS should be fun.

I Hate The WGA Elections

I hate it when we're asked to vote for new WGA officers and board members. We get inundated with mails, each side attacking the other, and then we get that bulging election packet, with its candidate statements, candidate rebuttals, rebuttals of rebuttals, rebuttals of rebuttals of rebuttals, the non-candidate statements, the rebuttals of non-candidate statements, and the endorsement ads. Accusations, counter-accusations, and counter-counter-counter accusations.

I don't bother with most of that crap. I read nothing but the candidates statements and make my decisions based on that, my personal knowledge (if any) of the individual candidates, and my own take on where the industry stands and what I believe the direction of the Guild should be. I do not vote according to slates. I vote according to a candidate's principles, experience, ideas, and vision. But most important of all, I vote. 

If you are a WGA member, I urge you to vote as well.

For what it's worth, here is who I voted for:

President: Elias Davis

Vice-President: Tom Schulman

Secretary-Treasurer: Christopher Keyser

Board Members: Patric Verrone, Howard Rodman, Carleton Eastlake, Dan Wilcox, Ian Deitchman, Linda Burstyn, Chip Johannessen, and Luvh Rakhe.

The Case of the Piss Poor Gold

My "novelette"  The Case of the Piss Poor Gold appears in the November issue of Ellery Queen Mystery Magazine, which is shipping to subscribers now and will be available at newsstands across the country next week. The story is an excerpt from my upcoming novel MR. MONK IN TROUBLE and is a "standalone" mystery featuring Adrian Monk's ancestor Artemis Monk, an assayer in the California gold rush town of Trouble in the 1840s.  

The book is set in the present day, but Adrian finds some startling similarities between the murder he's solving now...and some of the cases Artemis investigated. The story in EQMM is about one of those cases.

I had a lot of fun writing the "Western Monk" stories in the book...but I couldn't have pulled it off without help from western pros like Richard Wheeler and Ken Hodgson, who kindly answered my dumb questions and reviewed my rough draft. I hope you enjoy the story now and the book in December!

UPDATE: As if that wasn't reason enough for me to pick up a dozen copies of the magazine, I just learned that there's a rave review for MR. MONK AND THE DIRTY COP in the same issue. Jon Breen gives the book three out of four stars and says, in part: "As in the TV series, sharp character comedy combines with ingenious and fairly-clued puzzle-spinning. Don't miss Lt. Disher's hilariously non-sensical variation on Sherlock Holmes' 'eliminate the impossible' dictum."

Elmer Kelton Passes Away

I just learned the terrible, sad news that one of my favorite authors, legendary western novelist Elmer Kelton, passed away this morning. He's considered one of the greatest writers of westerns ever...in fact, he was named the number one western writer of all time by the Western Writers of America, which has honored him with seven Spur Awards for Best Novel. 

His best known work is probably THE GOOD OLD BOYS...thanks to the Tommy Lee Jones movie version... but his many memorable novels include THE TIME IT NEVER RAINED, THE SMILING COUNTRY, HONOR AT DAYBREAK, SLAUGHTER, THE DAY THE COWBOYS QUIT, and his "Texas Rangers" and "Sons of Texas" series. 

I don't think he ever got the credit and recognition he deserved outside of the western genre and that's a damn shame. His books weren't just great westerns...they were terrific novels by any measure. I was lucky enough to meet him once, a few years back, when he was in Los Angeles and found him to be a gracious, friendly, and funny man. He will be missed but I'm convinced that his work will continue to captivate, entertain, and enlighten readers for generations to come. 

UPDATE: Bill Crider,a top-notch western writer himself, remembers Kelton.

.357 VIGILANTE is back...run for your lives

.357 Vigilante, the first book in my long out-of-print paperback series, is now available in a Kindle edition.

I wrote it under the pseudonym "Ian Ludlow" (so I would be on the shelf next to Robert Ludlum) back when I was a college student in the 1980s. The movie rights were sold to New World Pictures...and my career as a screenwriter was born. Alas, the movie was never made. Here's the scoop on the book:

A Man Can Only Take So Much...Before He Takes Revenge.

.357 VIGILANTE

He lost a father, a friend, a whole way of life...now he's looking for justice down the barrel of a gun.

Brett Macklin was a freewheeling son of sunny California, a collector of vintage cars and a connoisseur of beautiful women. But when his father is gunned down by a street gang, Macklin becomes something else -- a deadly weapon against crime. He won't stop until he's wiped out the rapists and killers who have turned Los Angeles into a war zone.

"As stunning as the report of a .357 Magnum, a dynamic premiere effort [...] The Best New Paperback Series of the year!" West Coast Review of Books

The sequel, .357 Vigilante #2: Make Them Pay is also available on the Kindle....and will soon be followed by the other books in the series.

Writing Staffs Shrinking

Variety reports what I've been hearing from TV writer friends for months...writing staffs are shrinking dramatically.

"I definitely feel as if there are (fewer) jobs out there," says Damon Lindelof, exec producer of ABC's LOST. "Whereas new shows from pilots that got picked up used to have 10 to 12 writers -- that was the size of our staff in 2004 -- we're just eight now.

[...]William Rotko, exec producer of the FBI-themed Patrick Swayze starrer THE BEAST, which finished its one-season run for A&E, says a confluence of events has altered the TV dynamic.

"I don't know if it's a combination of the recession and the prior writers' strike," he says. "They kind of landed one after another. After the writers' strike, it seemed this was going to happen anyway, but the recession sped up the process of reducing the size of the writers' room.

There are also fewer scripted shows than there were in the past. The major networks have all given up offering new, scripted fare on Saturdays, there's more reality shows than ever, and NBC has scrapped five hours of prime-time for Jay Leno's new show.

While cable has picked up some of the slack by producing original dramas, they are short orders with small staffs. It all adds up to the worst job market for TV writers than I have ever seen before. It's shocking to me how many of my friends...experienced, successful scribes, some with shelves of Emmy Awards... are out of work right now. 

Two Jews in Kentucky Part 5

Here are some photos from the International Mystery Writers Festival...all taken by Bryan Leazenby. You can see more Festival photos here. The first photo below, taken after the Angie Awards show, is me with Sue Grafton. The second is David Breckman, writer/producer of MONK cleaining my podium with Lysol during the presentation.  The third photo is from the First Lady of Mystery dinner honoring Sue...I was the host for the event. That's me with Sue and Zev Buffman. And, finally, one more shot of me covered in BBQ at the opening of the Awards show (You can click on the photos for a larger view)

    

Sweet News for Willeford Fans

Variety reports that Neil LaBute will write and direct an adaptation of Charles Willeford's novel BURNT ORANGE HERESY. It's not Willeford's best novel, but I'm glad to see any of his work make it to the screen. Past adaptations have been a mixed bag... COCKFIGHTER and WOMAN CHASER were great, MIAMI BLUES was a major disappointment. 

Writer Beware Kicks Butt

The Bookseller reports that a judge has thrown out a lawsuit by so-called "literary agent" and vanity press "publisher" Robert Fletcher against Writer Beware and ordered him to repay Victoria Strauss and Ann Crispin  all of their legal costs. 

Judge Thomas Connolly, who ruled that Fletcher and his company were liable for the costs, said: "The plaintiffs have exhibited extreme bad faith in bringing this frivolous lawsuit for the sole purpose [of] causing great expense and harassment to Crispin and Strauss... The court concludes and finds that this case was brought in bad faith by the plaintiffs."

The judge added that Fletcher's purpose was "not to prevail in the lawsuit but just to bankrupt the defendants". [...]Fletcher claimed the blogs "alleged fraud, misrepresentation and dishonesty towards authors" and were "defaming and libeling" by "publishing warnings to potential authors of the fraudulent practices of LAG and Fletcher". Fletcher operates a fee-charging literary agency/writers' consultancy under a variety of names.

I hope this will serve as a warning to others like Fletcher, and there are many of them out there, who think they can intimidate Writer Beware and prevent them from warning writers about deceptive publishing practices. 

It's also my hope that more organizations will join the Science Fiction Writers of America and the Mystery Writers of America in sponsoring Writer Beware...and that the support of major writers' organizations will frighten off scammers from filing frivolous lawsuits against the site.  

Two Jews in Kentucky Part 4

I had a lot of fun hosting the Angie Awards last night and, despite a few technical glitches, the audience seemed to enjoy it, too. I was stunned to pick up the Owensboro Messenger Inquirer this morning and see this splashed across five columns on the front page:

   Mystery festival's stars praise event, Owensboro

Lee Goldberg, a writer for the TV show “Monk,” waves a rib while wearing a Moonlite Bar-B-Q Inn T-shirt on Sunday during the annual International Mystery Writers Festival’s Angie Awards ceremony in the Jody Berry Cabaret Theatre at the RiverPark Center. Photo by John Dunham, M-I

By Keith Lawrence, Messenger-Inquirer

Published: Monday, August 17, 2009 12:29 AM CDT

Voice actor Phil Proctor gave a ringing endorsement to Owensboro's International Mystery Writers Festival in accepting his Angie Award for best featured actor in "Three Blind Mice" on Sunday night at the RiverPark Center.

"I love this festival," Proctor told the dinner crowd in the center's Jody Berry Cabaret Theatre. "I love this award. I want this festival to go on forever, and I'll do everything in my power to see that it does."

The third annual festival downsized because of the closing of the Executive Inn Rivermont -- and the resulting hotel room shortage -- and construction along the riverfront.

Instead of stage plays, it produced four radio plays by Agatha Christie -- "Personal Call," "Butter in a Lordly Dish," "Three Blind Mice" and "Yellow Iris."

"Personal Call," a Christie work first performed on the BBC Radio Light Programme on May 31, 1954, won top honors at the festival.

The Angie Awards are named for actress Angela Lansbury, who was honored with the festival's first First Lady of Mystery award in 2007.

Travis Estes, the center's director of sales and marketing, said the festival drew more people than had originally been expected.

"We had to add seats for every performance," he said. "There are still more people coming from out of town than from Owensboro, but the local audience picked up on the weekend from word of mouth."

David Breckman, a writer, producer and director for the TV show "Monk," wrote and directed a 10-minute film, "Murder in Kentucky," during the festival.

"We would like to do more of that in the future," Estes said. "The mystery genre attracts a more mature demographic, but the Hollywood component brings in younger people to the festival."

Lee Goldberg, a writer for such shows as "Monk" and "Diagnosis Murder," was master of ceremonies for the awards show.

He came out in a stained Moonlite Bar-B-Q Inn T-shirt carrying a plate of bones.

Owensboro and the RiverPark Center, Goldberg said, have become "a hotbed of mystery ... a major force in the mystery field."

"Oh, how beautiful," Melinda Peterson said as she accepted her Angie for best featured actress. "How amazing, warm, kind and generous the people of Owensboro are."

"I love this town," Amy Walker said in accepting her award for best actress. "I fell in love with all of you last year."

Gary Sandy, best known for his work on the TV series "WKRP in Cincinnati," was named best actor.

"I was just knocked out by the radio guys two years ago," he said. "May this last forever. To be a part of it is too much."

Rupert Holmes' "You're the Thorn in my Side" was named best song of the festival.

David Ossman was named best director.

Novelist and Louisville native Sue Grafton was named First Lady of Mystery for her work as a novelist in the Kinsey Millhone mysteries -- "A is for Alibi, "B is for Burglar"... .

Secretary of State Trey Grayson commissioned 10 people who have appeared at all three festivals as Kentucky Colonels.

Special Angies went to the city of Owensboro, Daviess Fiscal Court, line producer Judith Walcutt, Breckman, Goldberg and David Dial of WNIN-FM in Evansville, which has broadcast the radio plays.

"I think this is a unique thing that sets Owensboro apart," Mayor Ron Payne said. "It puts us on the map and sells us as a culture center."

"It looks like it's been very successful," Judge-Executive Reid Haire said. "It's a shot in the arm for tourism and the arts in our community."

The festival is the brainchild of Zev Buffman, RiverPark president, who produced more than 40 Broadway shows and 150 national tours of Broadway shows early in his career.

Winners List

These are the Angie Awards presented by the International Mystery Writers Festival at the RiverPark Center on Sunday night:

Best Play -- "Personal Call"

Best Actor -- Gary Sandy as James Brent in "Personal Call"

Best Actress -- Amy Walker as Pam Brent in "Personal Call"

Best Featured Actor -- Phil Proctor as Paravicini in "Three Blind Mice"

Best Featured Actress -- Melinda Peterson as Mrs. Boyle in "Three Blind Mice"

Best Song -- Rupert Holmes' "You're The Thorn in My Side"

Best Director -- David Ossman

My wife saw it and said "I'm so glad you didn't make a fool of yourself while you were there." My daughter's reaction: "Only people in Kentucky will see that, right? It's not going to be in our newspaper is it?" Me, I loved it.

More from Owensboro

Monk Book Commerical from Germany

More Lit Detectives Coming to British TV

Broadcast Magazine reports that author Peter Robinson's Inspector Banks is coming to television...in two-hour movie for the UK's ITV network from Left Bank Pictures, the same folks responsible for the fine WALLANDER series. The first book to be filmed, which will serve as a pilot for more, will be AFTERMATH. Meanwhile, the same company is producing three  movies based on Michael Dibdin's Aurelio Zen novels RATKING, VENDETTA, and DEAD LAGOON for the BBC...as well as a second season of WALLANDER tales.

Two Jews in Kentucky Part 3

It's been a busy two days in Owensboro at the International Mystery Writers Festival. Yesterday, I did an interview with Fox WTVW about the Festival and my MONK books, did some last minute  tinkering with the Angie Awards script, attended several of the "Live Radio  Theatre" plays, chatted for awhile with actors Gary Sandy (who guest-starred in a DIAGNOSIS MURDER episode that I wrote), Amy Walker, and Firesign Theatre's Phil Proctor while dining on some fine Moonlite BBQ, and then spent several hours observing my buddy David Breckman shoot his short mystery film "Murder in Kentucky" with local actors and technicians.  All in all, it was a lot of fun.

Tonight, I hosted a dinner presentation honoring Sue Grafton and interviewed her with questions supplied in advance by the audience. She was terrific...funny, informative, and very entertaining. I'll post pictures from the event as soon as I get my hands on some. Then Sue, her husband, and I attended a live broadcast of the "Live Radio Theatre" plays, which were aired on the local NPR affiliate. Several theatre bigshots from New York flew in for the plays to measure their Broadway and national tour potential. I hear the response was already wildly enthusiatic. 

Tomorrow night, I'm moderating a panel with Sue, authors Will Lavender and Laura Benedict, and then  later that night I'll be hosting the Angie Awards, where events will include David and Sue being commissioned as Kentucky Colonels by the Kentucky Secretary of State.  My hosting duties actually require a little bit of acting, something I haven't done much of before, so it should be an interesting experience for me...and, hopefully, an entertaining one for the audience!

Two Jews in Kentucky Part 2

The day started with a BBQ brunch at the Moonlite BBQ. I was disappointed this time...the meal didn't live up to my memory of the place or my high expectations. Did I just imagine how good it was last year? After lunch, I browsed at the two used bookstores in town, didn't buy anything, then went down to the Riverpark Performing Arts Center  to lead a workshop on TV writing and sign some books. That was fun. 

Afterwards, I chatted for an hour with the Firesign Theatre's David Ossman and Judith Walcutt, their son Orson (who placed Mapes in the stage version of THE MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE), and the very talented Amy Walker, the  woman of a thousand voices. 

I did a quick rewrite of the script for the Sunday Awards show, then ran out for some more BBQ, this time at a place called Old South BBQ, that was even more  disappointing that Moonlite was. I changed my clothes and returned to the Riverpark Center to host an outdoor screening of THE BEST TV SHOWS THAT NEVER WERE. It was so great to see that with an audience and to hear their laughter. 

While I was doing all of that, David Breckman was writing and casting his short film, which he will be shooting tomorrow in Owensboro. The script is terrific (a light-hearted murder  mystery,of course, set in a theatre) and the cast and crew are absolutely thrilled to be doing it. David took some of the folks out for a late night snack and their enthusiasm was palpable. They see this as an amazing opportunity. I'm going to enjoy watching them all at work.

Tomorrow, I actually have the day off, but I am going to spend it at  a desk somewhere at the Riverpark Center, working on my movie script, but I'll be available if David needs a hand. I might also catch two of the four plays being  performed during the Festival. 

Saturday I'm leading a panel with Sue Grafton and hosting a dinner  in her honor, and then Sunday I am hosting the awards ceremony. I shall report back to you tomorrow.  

Who is the Clueless Moron now?

Back in 2004, under the heading "Clueless Morons," I blogged about a group calling themselves the Colonial Fan Force, who took out a full-page ad in Variety clamoring for a BATTLESTAR GALACTICA movie starring the original cast. The ad read, in part: 

Millions of fans still dream of seeing the Battlestar Galactica roam the heavens once more in a big screen continuations of the epic story that began in 1978 with the original cast and characters leading a new generation of warriors

I wrote:

Yeah, right... there are millions, no TENS of millions, of fans clamoring for the return of Herb Jefferson, Laurette Sprang, Dirk Benedict, and Richard Hatch (who is not nearly as powerful an actor as the nude guy of the same name on "Survivor"... nor as successful). I suspect the real audience is about 100 fat guys in their 40s, who at this very moment are busily duping all their Heather Thomas videos onto DVD..

[...]I am always amused by the losers who spend their comic book money on pointless ads like this (or, worse, the ones who publish a synopsis of, or excerpt from, their unsold screenplays)

[...] the folks at "The Colonial Fan Force" urge the readers of Variety (most of whom are entertainment industry professionals) to write writer/producer Glen A. Larson and Tom DeSanto, a guy who once tried to launch a movie version of the TV show. This shows just how little the people who paid for this ad understand about how the business works...and even sillier when you consider the SciFi Channel is already in the midst of shooting a new "Battlestar Galactica" TV series from NBC/Universal Studios with an all-new cast led by Edward James Olmos.

And that was the nicest thing I had to say about the Colonial Fan Force. 

Well, ladies and gentlemen, the joke is on me. Today Variety reported that Universal, Glen A. Larson, Bryan Singer and Tom DeSanto are mounting a feature film version of BATTLESTAR GALACTICA that will be a "complete re-imagining" that is unrelated to the recently wrapped series.

While this isn't the reunion the Colonial Fan Force was clamoring for, and it's happening after the end of the new BATTLESTAR GALACTICA series, and it isn't the result of a letter-writing campaign, it is a feature film and it's likely to be closer to the original series than the SciFi Channel series was.

So who is the clueless moron now? It looks like it is me.

Two Jews in Kentucky

MONK writer/producer/director David Breckman and I arrived in Owensboro, Kentucky today for the International Mystery Writers Festival. Everybody has treated us wonderfully but I've only been here a few hours and already have an anecdote to share (or, as David said afterward, "as it was happening, I knew I was living an anecdote that I would be telling for years."). After a screening of MONK clips on a giant, outdoor screen, a fan came up to us with his family and asked us to signed his set of MONK dvds.

"I just knew Monk was written by Jews," the fan said.

"Excuse me?" David said.

"Breckman, Goldberg, you're Jews," he said. "Monk is so Jewish.  Jews write the best stuff in Hollywood.  All the greatest entertainment comes  from Jews. Star Trek was created by a Jew.  We just love what you Jews do."

The man obviously meant well and to compliment our work, and he was nervous, so we didn't take offense. David signed the box:  David Breckman, a grateful Jew.

David is a super busy Jew these days.  In addition to his MONK works, he's also got pilots at USA and NBC. He'll also be writing, casting,  shooting and screening a ten minute  mystery between now and Sunday. It will be done entirely with local actors and aspiring film-makers, so it should be a lot of fun. Jews are so talented.

MWA Teams with Writer Beware

The Mystery Writers of America announced today that its co-sponsoring Writer Beware. I'm sure it will be no surprise to regular readers of this blog to learn that I spear-headed this effort.  I'm thrilled that we're able to help support Writer Beware...and I hope it leads to other professional writers organizations following our lead. Here's an article I wrote for the MWA newsletter about it:

The Mystery Writers of America is joining the fight against writing scams by contributing $1000 towards Writer Beware, a website & blog created by the Science Fiction Writers of America to expose fraudulent publishing practices and educate authors on how to protect themselves from being swindled.

“We are pleased to be able to support the important work that Writer Beware is doing on behalf of all writers, professional and aspiring, by exposing scams aimed at defrauding authors,” said Frankie Bailey, the MWA's executive vice president.

Writer Beware’s website, which was launched by SFWA in 1998, can be used by20any writer anywhere, regardless of whatever genre, fiction or non-fiction, that they work in...or their professional standing. And Writer Beware blog offers up-to-the-minute information on specific scams and schemes, along with essential advice for writers. They also help authors who have questions about individual agents, publishers, or contests.

“We are not only showing our support and making Writer Beware stronger, but sending a message to scammers that we won’t stand by and let them take advantage of authors,” said Lee Goldberg, the MWA board member who will act as the MWA liaison with Writer Beware.

"It’s vital that organizations like SFWA and MWA team up on these kinds of challenges,” said Russell Davis, President of SFWA. “We can accomplish far more working together than we can working on our own, and I hope other organizations will see this as an invitation to join in these types of group efforts.”

I will be reaching out to the International Thriller Writers and the Romance Writers of America to ask them to join us in supporting Writer Beware and fighting scammers.

UPDATE: Publishers Weekly has picked up the news...which is great. The more word spreads about Writer Beware, the less likely it will be that people will be taken advantage of by scammers.

TV Main TItle of the Week

Me on Me

The second part of Lori Ham's interview with me is now up on her No Name Cafe site. Here's an excerpt:

Café: What do you like best and which is harder — writing novels or TV? 

Lee: They are entirely different experiences. Television is very much a group effort and what you are writing is a blueprint that lots of other people are going to use as the basis for their creative work, whether it’s the actor, the director, the production designer. And when you write a script it’s not locked in stone. It’s going to change. It’s going to change because everybody has notes. It’s going to change because production concerns force rewrites. It’s going to change because of actors and directors. 

A book is entirely my own and unaffected by production concerns or actors. I’m the actors, the director, the production designer [...] It’s not a blueprint. It is the finished product and it won’t change much once I am done with it. It’s not a group effort — I plot it myself and I write it by myself. It’s entirely in my head and I live it for months. Creatively speaking, there’s a big difference between writing prose and writing a script. In a book, you are seducing the reader. You are bringing them into your imagination and holding them there for as long as they’re reading the book. You construct everything. You construct the sets, the wardrobe, the world. You’re God. You can even read a character’s thoughts. 

.357 Vigilante Returns....

I admit it...I've got the Kindle fever...and I've got it bad. I don't mean reading books on the Kindle, I mean creating Kindle editions of my out-of-print books. The idea of making easy money from stuff that was buried in boxes in my garage is too good to resist (thank you, Joe Konrath!).

So the 1985 "men's action action novel" .357 VIGILANTE #2: MAKE THEM PAY by Ian Ludlow is now available as a $2.99 Kindle edition. Here's the scoop on the book:

"As stunning as the report of a .357 Magnum, a dynamic premiere effort [...] The Best New Paperback Series of the year!" West Coast Review of Books 

 Brett Macklin is justice -- a one-man judge, jury and executioner, wiping out the L.A. street scum that the police can't catch, that the law can't hold -- dealing sweet revenge from the barrel of his .357 Magnum. Now Macklin's target is Wesley Saputo, child porn kingpin and murderer who has slipped through the courts time after time, only to kidnap, rape and kill again...and again. Macklin's mission: locate and brutally destroy Saputo before he finds another little girl blue...

This Kindle edition includes a special Afterword essay, "Hot Sex, Gory Violence: How One College Student Earns Course Credit and Pays His Tuition," which was originally published in Newsweek magazine and that explains the origins of the ".357 Vigilante" series and the "Ian Ludlow" pseudonym.

I've found the manuscripts for the other two books in the series, as well as the unpublished fourth novel, and will upload them over the coming weeks.

UPDATE: Here are some blog reviews of MAKE THEM PAY...from Chadwick Saxelid, S. Michael Wilson,  and Marty McKee.

The GI Joe Cartoon

Roy Scheider once complained on SEAQUEST that he was a live actor stuck in an animated cartoon. That's how the cast of GI JOE must have felt... only much, much more strongly. 

At least 90% of the movie --100 % if you include the computer-generated sets -- is a cartoon with a few living, breathing people (the actors at least, not their characters) matted in. There wasn't even an attempt to make the animated/CGI portions appear the slightest bit realistic (or the characters, for that matter). 

The best parts of the movie -- and I use the terms "best" and "movie" very loosely -- are the computer-generated battles. When the CGI action stops for some "emotional" moments, the movie becomes unbearably dull. The backstory flash-backs are so heavy-handed, cliche-ridden and obvious that I found myself longing for the CGI to return. The comedy bits, mostly lame one-liners badly delivered by Marlon Wayons,  portraying a steroid-pumped Stepin Fetchit, were only slightly less painful. Marlon wasn't the only guy playing a caricature, not by far (I kept waiting for the sharpnosed, penny-pinching Jew to show up). With the emphasis on CGI, caricature seems to be all that's left to quicky and effectively convey character...or at least what passes for it. 

CGI is no longer a tool in story-telling -- it has become the story-telling. It's the Michael Bayification of cinema. Who needs acting, character, plot or the emotional investment of the audience when you have CGI? Every big movie coming out of Hollywood now is a videogame or a toy commercial masquerading as a film. A movie can be big without being 99% CGI and 1% cardboard characters.

On the way to the theater, my wife and I remembered how we used to go to the movies every week. Now months can go by without us seeing a movie. What changed? Well, watch GI JOE and you'll see.

I'm sure GI JOE will make 100 gazillion dollars...and its a damn shame.

Busy Week

I have been absent from the blog, working hard on my screenplay and my latest Monk novel, because I have a very busy week head of me. On Tuesday, I am leading a seminar on episodic TV writing & producing for representatives of China Central Television...which should be a very interesting experience...and then on Wednesday, I'm heading off to Owensboro, Kentucky with my buddy David Breckman, writer-producer-director of MONK,  to participate in the third annual International Mystery Writers Festival. I'll be moderating several panels, and doing Toastmaster duties, while David will write, producer and direct an original short film with a group of theatre students. Kentucky native Sue Grafton will also be on hand for panels and such. It should be a lot of fun.  

I'm looking forward to the flights to and from Kentucky because it will be my first opportunity to really try out my Kindle. I haven't had any time to read since I got it...

Gunsmoke to ride again

CBS Films is developing a theatrical version of GUNSMOKE, and they've hired Gregory Poirier, screenwriter of NATIONAL TREASURE: BOOK OF SECRETS to write it:

The action-adventure will re-imagine Marshal Matt Dillon, the hero of the classic Western, for modern audiences. The story will be set in the same American West as the original but will feature a contemporary look and modern action twists. Poirier is said to be close to completing a first draft of the script.

(Thanks to Thierry Attard for the heads-up.)

I'm Going Kindle Crazy

I've just posted another old, out-of-print book of mine on the Amazon Kindle Store...my 1991 paperback Unsold TV Pilots: The Greatest Shows You Never Saw, which was the basis for the hour-long ABC special "The Best TV Shows That Never Were" and the hour-long CBS special "The Greatest Shows You Never Saw. It is now available in a special $2.49 Kindle edition. Here's the book jacket copy:

“The Best Bathroom Reading EVER," - San Francisco Chronicle

"A must-browse for media freaks.” —USA Today

“Irresistible and enthralling.” —Hartford Courant

“Full of fool’s gold and genuine TV treasures.” —The New York Post

This lively and entertaining book looks at the three hundred best and worst TV series ideas—known in the industry as "pilots"—that never made it to primetime. From the adventures of a Samurai D.A. to the antics of an invisible alien baby, Lee Goldberg details the greatest shows you never saw.

The paperback was originally published by Carol & Company and was an abridgment of my fat hardcover  "Unsold Television Pilots 1955-1989," which contained over 2000 pilots. Maybe some day I'll get around to making that big book into a Kindle edition, too.

The Wild, Wild Joseph West

The folks over at the Western Fiction Review have a great Q&A interview up with author Joseph A. West, who wrote those terrific GUNSMOKE tie-ins a few years back. Lately, he's been writing the Ralph Compton books as a work-for-hire writer and his comments about that will give you some insight into what it's like to be a working writer these days:

"The Ralph Compton books are all work-for-hire, and I write them because I like to eat. I can’t write in Ralph’s style, nor do I try. I do the best I can, send the novel off to New York and keep my fingers crossed. Touch wood, they’ve never bounced one back to me for a rewrite, so I must be doing something right. At the moment times are hard for writers, and I appreciate any work I can get. In a way, a work-for-hire is a great compliment from the publisher. Three or four times a year, I get an email from my editor that says simply: “Joe, write me another Compton, due XXXX.” I never hear from him again until the next assignment. I guess he knows I always send him a professional product on time."

I have great admiration for guys like Joseph West...talented, hard-working professional writers who do the job because they love it and because it's what they do. And they do it damn well. Aspiring writers could learn a lot from him.

The Last Picture Show

Larry McMurtry, one of my favorite authors, says that his next book, RHINO RANCH, may be his last.

"It's a finite gift, for sure," he says of novel writing. "I'm about at the end of it. I can write certain things. I don't think I can write fiction any more. I think I've used it up over 30 novels. That's a lot of novels. [...]Most great novels are written by people between 40 and 60, or 35 and 60. Not too many great novels are written by people over 75. Hardly any. Maybe Tolstoy."

RHINO RANCH comes out August 11th and is yet another sequel to THE LAST PICTURE SHOW, as were TEXASVILLE, DUANE'S DEPRESSED, and WHEN THE LIGHT GOES. I'm a huge fan of McMurtry's work, but I've found his "contemporary" novels of the last few years, particularly his sequels to THE LAST PICTURE SHOW, to be morose, meandering, and boring tales that lack his usual punch. I'll buy it and read it anyway, of course. Over the last 20 years, by far his best books have been his westerns, most notably LONESOME DOVE and its sequels and prequels.

But this is not the first time McMurtry has threatened to quit...and then followed the announcement by writing a great novel. 

TV Main Title of the Week

You Can Be a Kindle Millionaire, Part 8

The second month of my Kindle experiment has ended and here are the results:

(Click on the image for a larger view).

All told, I made $375 in royalties selling three out-of-print novels at $1.99 each, a short story collection at 99 cents, and an out-of-print, non-fiction reference book for $2.39 .

THE WALK sold 444 copies in June and 373 copies in July. My short story collection THREE WAYS TO DIE sold 54 copies in June and 40 in July. So sales of both titles have dropped in their second month on sale. 

Still, I'm very happy to have sold 817 copies of THE WALK to readers who missed the book the first time around in hardcover. At this rate, it won't be long until I've sold more copies of THE WALK on the Kindle than the book sold in print.

On July 14, I added my novel MY GUN HAS BULLETS to the Kindle Store. It has sold 95 copies in 17 days at $1.99 each, earning me $65 in royalties. On July 17, I added the sequel, BEYOND THE BEYOND, which has only sold 29 copies at the same price, earning me $20. 

Two days ago, I added TELEVISION SERIES REVIVALS. I set the price for that one at $2.39, just to be daring. It has sold 17 copies so far, earning me $14.28.

(All those titles are also available on Scribd and Smashwords, but so far I've earned less than $10 in combined royalties from both sites over the last two months. They can't compete with Amazon and the Kindle).

This month I did slightly better than last month, but I also added three more books to the mix. 

So far, I have earned nearly $700 on out-of-print books that I thought were long past their earning potential for me. That's not a lot of money, but it was enough to buy me a Kindle and leave plenty of money left over to buy books for it (I'm still not earning anywhere near what Joe Konrath and John August, my inspirations in this endeavor, are making with their work...but I am thankful to them both for showing me the way). 

I've said this before, but I don't think the Kindle is the wave of the future for authors or publishing...at least not yet. Not even for self-publishing. There just isn't enough money in it for original works to make a living at it or simply a decent wage.

But not all authors care about making money. Some are in it "for the art" and just to reach people. They are happy giving it away for free...or for next to nothing. Well, let me tell you something, the "free" and $1.99 Kindle books that I have sampled so far have been, for the most part, unspeakably horrendous shit. There's a reason most of these authors can't find publishers for their work. It's stuff so awful you can't even give it away. The Kindle won't change that. The novelty of downloading crap, even when it's free, will pass quickly.

I do think, though, that for authors with out-of-print books sitting in their drawers earning nothing but dust that publishing on the Kindles makes a lot of sense. I don't see the downside. It's found money. And it's fun to watch the royalties and sales click up in real-time (yes, it's a new way to procrastinate!)

I was surprised to discover, once I got my Kindle, that my out-of-print books that I posted myself are better formatted than some of my in-print titles posted by my publishers. I will be talking to my publishers about it.